The Big Sister's First Book (and Happy Anniversary to BFWP!)

Their Sister Love began just
over  7 years 13 years ago. 

(Photos subject to copyright)

Sparked by this week's* Get in Touch with Your Inner Dummy Challenge and thanks to her wonderful relationship with The Little Sister, The Big Sister began writing her own "Dummies Book."

Unprompted, she wrote the following list in her journal and decided to share it with the BFWP readers in honor of our one year anniversary. 

The Books for Walls Project is about more than just reading, it is about relationship building and learning more about the wonderful people inhabiting this lovely planet. 

Without further ado we give you...

Big Sistering for Dummies

This list is to help you and your younger 

siblings get along and be friends

#1 Remember you are worshiped by a younger person.

#2 The smaller (younger) person wants to be the same as you because they like you so much.

#3 Remember even though they can be frustrating, they still love you.

#4 If you do not want them to be in your space or room do not have a keep out sign. That makes them more curious. Let them come in and look, but you can have privacy and thing off limits.

#5 Try to be kind to them, remember you were their age once. If they ask you to play and you do not want to you can simply say, "no, but I would like to some other time!"

#6 Try to love them. Look at them and try to recognize that they are human beings with feelings.

#7 You need time for yourself, do something relaxing, by yourself.

#8 Find something you and your sibling have in common and like to do together because you are going to be with them a long time.

#9 If you are frustrated walk out of the room/get away or ask for help. Adults are really important at times like these. You are not responsible for your younger sibling, your parents are and it is okay to ask them for help!

#10 The reason it's worth it to work on your relationship with your sibling is because when you are sick or down they are always there for you and you'll always have a friend to hang out with. The rewards are worth all the work!

And thankfully their Sister Love keeps growing and 

growing! The Little Sister's great idea for 

a photo hiding their faces...Hugging! 

(Photos subject to copyright)

Thank you Big Sister for writing this wonderful list --we cannot wait for the whole book. 

Thank you, Dear Readers, for sharing your time and your thoughts with us and of course for taking Challenges --oh, we LOVE when you take Challenges and leave comments.

Thank you to our Wonderful Regular Contributors, both old and new. Your participation keeps us smiling and ever inspired. 

Thank you to the Writers of the World who keep us ever-content and supplied with good books to read. 

Thank you Librarians of the World for all of the work you do.

Thank you to The Sisters who are a great inspiration to their parents and, thanks to them, we began this wonderful project!

Without all of you we wouldn't be celebrating our One Year  Six Year Anniversary 

and so one thousand thanks and
Happy Anniversary!

Over the next couple of weeks we'll be cleaning up the site 

and making it a little simpler to navigate the challenges 

--we want it to be fun and easy to take 

part in the Books for Walls Project. 

Hope to see you again soon!

*This was originally published on our first anniversary in April of 2011.

The Art of Listening

“Asking questions and listening intently to the stories that emerge is one of the most powerful forces in the world. If we all take one hour this year to do it, we’ll strengthen our national fabric at a time when it desperately needs it.” Dave Isay, StoryCorps founder and president 

A whole lot of listening goes on around here. We listen to audiobooks, podcasts, and music is often streaming from speakers or earbuds somewhere in the house. Most of all though, we listen to each other. Like most things in life listening takes work and there is always, always, more to learn. In the past several years we’ve been researching, studying new techniques, and we have begun to really honor the art of listening.

An important part of the art is one that seemed surprising: Quiet. “We have two ears and one mouth and we should use them proportionally.” Such a simple idea, but one that holds so much wisdom, as Susan Cain explains in her book Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking. Quiet was recommended by a dear friend, singer-songwriter May Erlewine. In person May seems to be well, quiet, but when she steps on stage her artful, engaging, energy effects everyone with the depth of her voice and poetry of her craft. May suggested the book because The Big Sister wondered how to be quiet and still be part of conversation. In a world that felt like we have to be loud to be heard, can we really be still and listen? We’re discovering that the answer is resoundingly, yes.

Why are we thinking about Listening?

In the United States on the fourth Thursday in November people gather: some to celebrate Thanksgiving, some to mourn*, and many struggle to communicate with those they love deeply but wonder: how did we get here, how can I get to know each other better, where do we begin? We’re guessing that people in each category might find some inspiration and hope in two tools that both focus on listening:

#TheGreatListen 

The Books for Walls Project first became involved with the StoryCorp National Day of Listening oral history project in 2011 with the Listening Challenge, we were even official state partners of the project. Our interview plans were thwarted by lack of proper recording equipment that is no longer a problem for anyone with a smart phone thanks to the StoryCorps app. Now anyone, anytime, anywhere can participate and become part of this incredible compendium of relationship oral history. Start now, click here: https://storycorps.me

 

Lets Talk, an interactive to bridge the gap

In 2016 the U.S. experienced a divisive, ugly, and unsettling election. The process of understanding, grieving, working to fix, and healing the division is just beginning. Thankfully, The New York Times created a resource to help heal the wounds and wouldn’t you know, it’s all about listening. With 19 interview questions, a few ground rules, just about anyone can be on the road to reconciliation. Click to learn more and even listen to a couple of the interviews: http://www.nytimes.com/2016/11/18/podcasts/how-could-you-19-questions-to-ask-loved-ones-who-voted-the-other-way.html?_r=0

Now get out there and listen.

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Listening Tools, Resources, References, Information, and Insights:

Another part of listening is empathy. Learn more with Brene Brown’s Empathy Primer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Evwgu369Jw

Are you an Educator? Bring the Great Listen to your students, get the toolkit: https://storycorps.me/about/the-great-thanksgiving-listen/

The Dad found a resource to help us understand the difference between judgement and being judgmental, definitely a doorway to better listening: https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/theory-knowledge/201305/making-judgments-and-being-judgmental

More about May Erlewine: http://mayerlewine.com

How to Be a Better Listener, Scientific American https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-be-a-better-listener/

Thanksgiving and the Myth of Native American “Savages”, from Scientific American https://blogs.scientificamerican.com/cross-check/thanksgiving-and-the-myth-of-native-american-savages/

*Why Thanksgiving Is A ‘National Day Of Mourning’ For Some Americans, Huffington Post: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/native-americans-national-day-of-mourning_us_5650c46ee4b0258edb31c3ca

Learn about the American Thanksgiving from “why turkey?” to “why Thursday”: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/0/thanksgiving-day-whats-the-history-of-the-holiday-and-why-does-the-us-celebrate-pilgrim-fathers/